So I mentioned last week that we came up with new cleaning system for our kids' rooms and that it's really, really working. And it is! Two weeks later and all 3 of my kids' rooms are still clean! And, I have to say that not only are they doing it themselves, but that it feels like a whole new house with clean rooms. I walk upstairs and instead of cringing as I walk past all 3 of their rooms or just closing my eyes and sprinting past them so I don't look into the rooms or just slamming doors in disgust as I walk past them, I now linger and smile and enjoy the view. Seriously. It feels that good.
So, here's what happened. The idea to take back control over their rooms first came to me when I was thumbing through this book. We bought this book on the recommendation of my good friend, Sue Thomas (who really, really needs to get a blog). Sue has a teenage daughter and is always a huge help on girl issues with me. I haven't actually read the whole book, but did take a peek through it and gave it to Emily to read. She devoured it, declared it too much work, and we gave up again. And then something snapped in me two weeks ago when I realized that I hadn't seen her carpet in months. So, I dove in. I actually started with Elizabeth's room because it's smaller and I thought there was more hope there. I did not take any before pictures because, frankly, I was sure they would break my camera. Here's what her bookshelf looks like after the big clean up. You'll realize that it's not perfectly spotless. More about that in a minute.
...We started with a huge purge and I was ruthless. I explained to her that she never played with many of her toys and that she couldn't even find half of her toys and that we needed to decide what she really wanted to keep and what she would be okay giving away to children who needed toys. I was surprised and proud at how much she wanted to give away to other children. Her little heart expanded a lot during this part of the day. We also threw away a lot of stuff. Anything that was broken or ripped got thrown out. And then we took everything off her bookshelves, cleaned them, and made piles of the things she was keeping. We had a few categories, such as books, Barbies, stuffed animals, Polly Pockets, etc.... We also talked about which things were her favorites and made sure that we made those easily accessible to her instead of up on a high shelf in her closet. And then we put everything back. But, this next part is key. She was the one who made the decision about where things should go and whether she wanted access to it. And I had to let go of my notions on what made sense. Because what makes sense to an overwhelmed 39-year-old mom is not the same thing as what makes sense to a 6-year-old. And that has made all the difference. It was her system and she owns it. And she assigned the homes to everything so there's no question about whether she knows where to put everything when she's done playing with it. That's also key. She has always complained about not knowing where everything goes and she's been right. I had previously controlled everything about their rooms and it clearly wasn't working.
Same thing with her desk. She got to make the choices. And they were not the same choices I would make, but I took a chance that this would work and it has! Now, here's the part that's hard. The room is not exactly as I would like it. The pegs on the wall are totally overloaded, her desk has lots of little bins on it and she has too much stuff on her floor in the corner. But, you know what? It's not my room. That is hard to accept. LOL! So, I've given up control, but in return, I get clean rooms. And I'm loving it! I also allowed her to keep some things taped up on the wall and that bugs the crud out of me. But, once again, it's okay and it's working.
.....And then I moved onto Emily's room. She has similar bookshelves, just more of them, so we started with the same idea. Her categories were books, diaries and journals (she loves to write and has 20 journals!!!), homework supplies, American Girl things, and a few stuffed animals. She also has another 6 foot bookshelf on her other wall that is full of books and her CD player. At 9, she loved this whole idea and loved the idea of making all the decisions herself. The control issue is huge with the pre-teen set. I have finally figured that much out. 
Now, onto Emily's desk. Yes, it's messier than I would have liked. But, 50 deep breaths later and I'm okay with it. She wanted to display all of her pottery and small pieces of artwork that she made in school so that is what is all along the top of her desk. Her bulletin board is full of stuff that, just a few months ago, I would have insisted be thrown away. But, this time I let her make the decisions. And so this stuff stays. On the whole, though, her room is better organized than Elizabeth's room. But, that's because she's the one who did the organizing and a 9-year-old can make more mature decisions than a 6-year-old, so that makes sense to me.
Along with more than a few Harry Potter posters all around her room.
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And now, finally, Andrew's room.
Andrew's room is tiny, as you can probably tell from this picture. It fits a twin bed, an armoire, a small bookshelf and that's about it. It does have a huge closet to the right of this picture, but his poor closet is not accessible to him. It's full of storage stuff. That's my next big project, actually, but that will have to wait for another day. One good thing about having a small room is that it took very little time to organize his room. Having a 4-year-old make organizing decisions did prove a little tricky and did take more explaining on my part, but he did most of this himself. It was his idea to keep stuffed animals off the floor by putting them on the bottom shelf of his bookshelf and it was his idea to just keep the things he sleeps with on his bed instead of somewhere else.
Following along with the idea that he got to make most of the decisions, we decided to keep some of his toys on his floor in the corner and not all put away in his armoire. This part still bugs me a bit, but really, it makes more sense to keep the toys he plays with every day out. And it's much easier for him to just push his trucks and legos into the corner when he's done than have to lift them up into his armoire. The goal is to have him keep his room clean and so we had to go with what works for him. And, as with the girls, I had to give up control and let him keep things taped up around his room.
Now, none of this is worth a hill of beans if they don't have some time for maintenance. And that has made a huge difference. Every night before bed, the kids have to go upstairs 15 minutes earlier than before we started this system. They have 15 minutes to get their rooms put back in order. And, so far, they haven't needed more than 5-10 minutes to get everything put away. And they haven't complained at all. They know where everything goes because they devised the system. They also now know what "go clean your room" means - it's not some vague goal of Mommy being able to see their floor or their clothes getting put down the laundry chute. "Go clean your room" now has a picture in their head and they all are able to understand what I mean by that because, once again, they determined their own systems.
So, there you have it. It took some time to do. Elizabeth's room took about 3 hours, Emily's room about 6 hours and Andrew's room about 1.5 hours to do. And now, with just 15 minutes or less every night, we have had clean rooms for 2 straight weeks!
